Common Misconceptions, Part II

You can read my Part One above

Myth: Steve Bartman cost the Chicago Cubs the 2003 World Series title
Fact: Cubs errors, costly pitching, and the New York Yankees cost the Cubs the championship and pennant, not Bartman

Back Story: For all of you who think Bartman was a dick and cost the Cubs the World Series then you're a hypocrite. If you were at that game and you saw that fly ball comes towards you, you would have also reached out and would have tried to catch that ball coming towards you.

This saga has a whole lot of 1986 World Series Bill Buckner to it. All we remember is the one incident that we think was the sole reason for the team's downfall, but we forget what really happened that fateful night.

Like in the '86 World Series, the Bartman incident was Game Six. The outcome of the game was independent on who would win the series (sort of). The Cubs were winning the series 3-2 versus the Florida Marlins in the NLCS and they now had five more outs to win a trip to the World Series. Let's now go back and revisit that night. The Cubs are up 3-0 off of a brilliant performance by (the then extremely healthy) Mark Prior.

Juan Pierre is on second base and Luis Castillo hits the infamous fly ball which Steve Bartman catches. However, the Castillo at bat kept going. Because Steve Bartman caught the ball, all technically Castillo hit was a foul ball. But Cubs left fielder Moises Alou acts like a three year old and starts throwing a temper tantrum on the field. He becomes irate at Bartman because he thought he could have caught the ball that Bartman caught (Alou later admitted Castillo's fly ball out out of his reach). If Alou had just gone about his business and not brought attention to the situation then we would not be talking about this event today.

But Alou throws a hissy fit and everyone is now talking about this catch. But the score is still 3-0 and so far Prior has not given up any runs. Castillo eventually draws a walk and (due to a WP thrown in the Castillo at bat) there are runners on the corners. Pudge then hits a single making the score 3-1. Right now there are runners at second and third, one out still, and Miguel Cabrera comes to the plate.

Here is where the eighth innings stops becoming Bartman's fault and starts becoming Mark Prior's, manager Dusty Baker's, and Alex Gonzalez's fault. Because Dusty Baker is such a shit manager, he still leaves Prior in the game. A career of leaving Prior in the game too long has made Prior what he is today. Even if you believe the Bartman catch somehow rattled Prior then Baker should have pulled Prior from the game. But if you believe like I do and that Prior is a professional and was so dominant at this point in time then he should have gotten out of the inning another way.

No matter, Prior stays in the game to pitch to Cabrera. Prior did what the greats do and induced a ground ball to infielder Alex Gonzalez. What Gonzalez should have done (and easily could have done) was turned a double play so the Cubs would have gotten out of the inning up by two runs. What Gonzalez did do was bobble and misplay the ball causing Miggy to be safe at first and causing the bases to be loaded.

Then pre-wrist injury Derrek Lee comes to the plate and hits a double to tie the game. The game is not over and the Cubs still have a shot to win the game. However, the Marlins go on to score a whopping eight runs that inning and win the game 8-3.

The Marlins eventually defeated the Chicago Cubs in seven and then went on to face the New York Yankees in the World Series and became World Champs in 2003.

I was in high school in the northern suburbs of Illinois and all my friends were Cubs fans. To their credit, the vast majority of them blamed Gonzalez more than Bartman, but they were in the small minority. All you had to do was listen to five seconds of Chicago sports talk radio to hear how livid Cubs fan were at the nerdy, headphones-guy fan.

What Cubs fans and baseball fans alike seem to forgot, was that the Bartman incident was only Game Six. If the Cubs had gone out and won Game 7 then this incident would have barely been a blip on baseball history's radar. Cubs fans also forgot that Mark Prior could have gotten Luis Castillo out instead of walking him. (I mean, this is Luis Castillo we're talking about here!). Now let's say the Cubs did win in either Game Six or Game Seven, they still had to defeat the New York Yankees to become champions and there was no guarantee that would have happened.

So Cubs fans, you can blame Bartman all you want, but what you should be doing is blaming Alez Gonzalez or Dusty Baker or Mark Prior.

One last note before I move on: Let's say Bartman doesn't catch that ball. Let's say no fans reaches out to try and grab that Catillo fly ball. You wanna know what would have happened? The same thing that did happen. The ball would have been a foul ball, not been caught by Alou and Prior would still have to work to get Castillo out.

Myth: "Love Song" by Sara Bereilles was written about a former lover / significant other
Fact: The song was written to spite her record company who told her she had to write a love song to put on her record.

Back Story: "I'm not going to write you a love song / 'cause you asked for it / 'cause you need one, you see / I'm not going to write you a love song / cause you tell me it's / make or break in this"

This song makes a whole lot more sense now that you know the true meaning of it, doesn't it?

When you first listen to this song you don't really pay attention to the words. It's light, it's uplifting, it's catchy, it's bubbly, and it's got a chorus you can sing to. And then you start learning the exact words of the chorus without really paying attention to the rest of the song and you think to yourself, "Wow, this chick really must have been pissed at her old man to write this song." I mean, the only words you really know are "I'm not going to write you a love song" and you think she means she is not going to write a love song to her significant other. But you would be wrong.

According to wikipedia (the most credible source, right?):

Sara Bareilles was inspired to write "Love Song" after failing to produce successful hits, and one critic said that she needed to write "a marketable love song". Bareilles has stated that statement gave her the drive and anger necessary to write "Love Song", proving that she could indeed write a hit, and that she had no double standards.

I promise you, listen closely to the words again and you will see that wikipedia and myself are right.



Myth: Taking steroids means you will automatically hit 50+ home runs
Fact: All steroids does is help you increase muscle mass

Back Story: People who think that just because you stick a needle in your ass full of PED's that you will automatically hit home runs at record setting paces. Those people are retarded. I could start taking steroids or HGH right now and all that will make me do is become fatter than I already am. You still need to work out along with taking steroids if you want to actually increase your muscle mass.

Even if you do work out (like all baseball players do) and build muscle in places where no muscle should be, you still need to have talent in order to hit dingers. Carrot Top and Dr. Dre used steroids to help them become the buff fellas you see today, but you put them in the batter's box right now and all they will do is strike out faster than Adam Dunn.

People seem to forget that even if you are taking steroids you still need to work at your craft like every other baseball player. No steroids will make up for the fact that you have a giant hole in your swing or the fact you have a bad batter's eye.

I will admit that once you make contact with a ball with the extra muscle mass you have obtained from PED's then the magic elixir you have squirted into your veins makes that ball travel farther. However, you still need to have been really good at baseball beforehand in order to put up the numbers that Palmeiro, Bonds, Sosa, and McGwuire did.

Lastly, pitchers were also juicing during the steroids era. I would like to know the true effect of a 'roided pitcher facing a 'roided batter if there truly are effects favoring one side or another. If Clemons faced Bonds, does that extra few miles an hour on Clemons pitches have any effect on Bonds' faster bat swing? I truly don't know, but if you claim otherwise then you're just talking out of your ass.

Myth: Lance Armstrong did not take steroids
Fact: Lance Armstrong won all those Tour De France's because he was on steroids.

Back Story: Everyone bike racing in Armstrong's era was on steroids.

Myth: The Beatles are your favorite band
Fact: Nobody's favorite band is The Beatles

Back Story: "The Beatles are the greatest band ever but you're a liar if you say that they are your favorite" -Matt Kaplan-

Myth: Wins, ERA, and Batting Average are good metrics to determine how good a baseball player is.
Fact: They are awful, outdated, archaic metrics and should be used for fantasy purposes only

Back Story: I am not going to spend a whole lot of time on this because this is pretty obvious. Just go to fangraphs.com, thehardballtimes.com, or read anything baseball related on this site and you know how dumb these metrics truly are. I've seen a pitcher pitch go 7 IP, 0 ER and take the loss because the score was (and was when he left the game) 1-0 and the run was unearned instead of earned. Wins and loses are independent on your talent and more dependent on how good your team's offense and defense is. ERA and batting average are based largely on luck rather than how good a baseball player is. Either way, if you want to truly measure how good a baseball player is, then you can not do so by using the statistics on ESPN's MLB page.

I think old school baseball guys are finally coming around to see the light side of the force. In 2010, Felix Hernandez only won 13 games and lost 12. In 2009, Zach Grienke won 16 games and Tim Lincecum won 15. The one thing these three pitchers have in common: they all won and deserved to win their Cy Young and did so without winning the most number of games in their respected league. The notion used to be you have to win at least 20 games in order to win the Cy Young but I believe now that sabermetrics are becoming more prevalent (and the fact nobody wins 20 games anymore) and even the oldest of old school guys are coming off of their old way of thinking, sabermetrics will rule the world. That, and my eye.

Mark McGwire Is Very Sad He Hit All Those 550 Foot Home Runs

Nice job of McGwire choosing the MLB network to do his admittance interview. A channel that no one in the world actually has. Well I have it, but no one else.

Michael Jackson is alive!

I'd like to say that i doctored this photo in microsoft paint, but unfortunately i did not. Nor is this some creepy halloween costume. Nope, it's Sammy showing up at the Latin Grammy awards looking at tad pale. Speculation is that Sammy either had a botched plastic surgery(no), has vitiligo(doubt it), simply put on too much make-up(no se), steroid side effects(si senor). You would think his wife would notice his discoloration, but she's probably too busy looking at herself in the mirror. Can't blame her

Big League Stew

Jason Giambi: The Career That Was

Seriously? That's Jason Giambi! He looks like Craig Counsell in the Team USA picture. He barely looks strong enough to hold that smile up, let alone hit 400 homers in the majors. His HR rate in the minors was 1 every 30 at-bats, but 1 every 17 in the majors. After winning the MVP award with a ridiculous 476 on-base percentage, it should have come as no surprise that he would unofficially test positive for steroids. With his release from the Athletics today, it may be the end to hsi controversial career.

At least he left us with so many memories, very few of which involve the game of baseball.


Is that Giambi or Craig Biggio?

Just one in a long line of *MVP* winners


WWF wrestlers told me they were injecting lidocaine and vitamin B12


I apologize for being wrong at whatever it is I did, which is nothing


There's a reason they call me "The Giambino"


Admit it, you're jealous of the stach


That's actually the look from the front. Shrinkage!

At least his head was always huge

And so it continues, the list of players who tested positive for performance enhancement drugs continues to be leaked one by one. This is like taking the band-aid off bit by bit instead of ripping the entire bandage off. Somehow just because the records for the tests were sealed, the players thought these stories would never come out. Through all the controversy of protecting those names even though federal prosecutors threatened players to testify under a grand jury, the names still got leaked one by one.

Ortiz is just the latest player to suffer from a damaging PR story made worse by the continuing denial of his own use. Earlier in February this year, Ortiz commented on testing for performance enhancing drugs stating:

“I would suggest everybody get tested, not random, everybody. You go team by team. You test everybody three, four times a year and that’s about it...suspend them for the whole year"

Now those words will bite him in the back with a vengeance. It seems like every time athletes deny doing something in the media and try so hard to absolve themselves from suspicion, they are most likely the ones that are doing it. So what do you say Big Papi, should we suspend you for the entire season or are you going to come out and say you didn’t know why Manny was injecting you in the butt inside the Boston dugout.

Of course, I have to say, many people were shocked by this revelation but it didn’t surprise me that much. Look how big he got in the first picture from when he was a rookie! Also, you can also spot cheaters because they are always spotted with other cheaters.

Now the Red Sox have something else to be proud of. Maybe there will be fake needle give a ways at Fenway Park to the first 10,000 fans to a game, so everyone can get in on the action.

Is Johnny Damon next to test positive? Those beards don’t grow without excessive testostrone!

sportshumor23

Bill James breaks his silence on roids, in the most boring way possible

Bill James put out a 4 page article describing his stance on steroid use in baseball. If you dont feel like reading, he basically makes the argument that all steroid users will eventually make the HOF cause perception will die down, past HOFers will endorse steroid users, and there was no legislation preventing steroid use. Apparently James has a boner for Will Clark too. Where's the love for Mark Grace??

(Unofficial) steroid list

The writers at rotoinfo put out a list of 103 names who they believe are on the list of 104 players who failed the anonymous steroid test back in 2004. They claim to have a reliable source, however given the lack of news exposure of this story, most people believe that the list is a fake. For instance, one name is mentioned twice and one of the main suppliers, Jason Grimsley, is somehow absent from the list. We will need further proof before all these players burned at the stake.

For me, seeing this list has solidified my opinion that it would be better for the game if the entire list was released to the public once and for all. There would no longer be any questions regarding which players are clean and which ones chemically added 30 feet to their fly balls. Simply putting out one name at a time every few months does nothing for the game and perpetuates a problem that has supposedly been solved the drug testing program.

The most interesting thing from this list are the 2 most juiced up teams. The Cubs and the Red Sox. Players from the cubs team on the list includes DLee, Burnitz, Alou, Sosa, Patterson, Zambrano, Prior, Wood, Clement, Alfonseca, Juan Cruz, A-Ram. So basically our entire starting rotaion was on the juice, allegedly. Shockingly the biggest redneck Michael Barrett is no on the list. Also, DLee doesnt seem like he needs the roids. Prior and Patterson seem too stupid to improve their games. And Juan Cruz weighed 90 pounds back then. I tend to agree with the rest of the blogosphere and have my doubts about the validity of the rotoinfo report.

Looking at the 2004 Cubs stats, they did have 4-30 homer players, in addition to Patterson's 24, Barrett's 16, and Todd Walkers 15. That is quite outside the norm. The pitching wasnt shabby either with a 3.8 ERA and the best K rate in the league. And all that couldnt prevent Latroy Hawkins from blowing 2 games to the Mets and keeping us out of the playoffs.

A-Rod Didn't Just Use Steroids...He Also Tips Shitty

Sports Illustrated writer Selena Robert has released more information about A-Rod, all of which will be detailed in her upcoming book "A-Rod". In addition to the charges she's already placed against him (all of which he's admitted), she alleges the following:

• A-Rod didn't stop using steroids when he came to the Yankees.
• A-Rod used steroids in high school. His coach and teammates in high school can apparently back this up.
  
• A-Rod has a gambling problem.
• A-Rod "pitch tipped" while on the Rangers, signaling opponents at the plate about which pitch selection a pitcher was using in lopsided game with the hope that they would eventually return the favor.
• A-Rod tipped the minimum, 15%, at Hooters.

It's a sad, sad day for baseball.

Best Actoroids

If Mickey Rourke wins an Oscar for best actor tonight, he will once and for all prove the performance enhancing abilities of steroids.

A-Roid Admits PED Use

It's official. This morning, Alex Roidriguez admitted his use of Performance Enhancing Drugs to ESPN's Peter Gammons.

Further reinforcing my theory that almost all MLB steroid use is connected to players and trainers from the Oakland A's and Texas Rangers organizations are A-Roid's comments on his PED use:

"When I arrived in Texas in 2001, I felt an enormous amount of pressure, felt all the weight of the world on top of me to perform, and perform at a high level every day...overall, I felt a tremendous pressure to play, and play really well in Texas...[but] all my years in New York have been clean."

Baseball, why do you hate me?

The steroid era that lasted for a solid 2 decades between 1985 and 2005, many of our heroes have been embarrassed and exiled from the game of baseball never to be heard of again. However, in the midst of the books, blood samples, and congressional hearings, we still had a handful of amazing all-time great baseball stars who avoided the steroid urge and rose to the level baseball greatness.

Alex Rodriguez is considered by most as the best baseball player, maybe ever. He was the number one overall selection. He won the batting title his first full year in the bigs, he went 40-40 as a 23 year old, he had 40+ home runs 6 years in a row, including 2 50 homer seasons, while playing the hardest defensive position short stop. He has 2 gold gloves, 14 all-star appearances, 3 MVP's, and made a seamless transition from short to 3rd. He was a pure, natural player that transcends all generations of the game.

This is why it is so disappointing to wake up this morning, look at any media outlet and see the headline that A-fraud tested positive for anabolic steroids as recently as 2003. It's difficult to continually be bashed over the head by someone you love and trust explicitly, but major league baseball keeps doing it again and again.

I'm guessing Albert Pujols is next