Alexei=Next Ozzie?

Doesn't anyone remember how bad Ozzie Guillen was at baseball? Have the colorful years of him playing "small ball" with scappy grinders, calling reporters fags and raping sex dolls with baseball bats tainted the black and white stats he (failed to) put up during fifteen year career? The Daily Herald is heralding Alexi Ramirez (.336 wOBA in 2008) as the next Ozzie Guillen (career wOBA of .275, .292 career high wOBA). Sigh.

The beginning of this article is uselessly boring, so let me skip to the "interesting" parts.

"[Alexei Ramirez is] just a good athlete, and above all, he wants to be good. He's hungry to be a great player in this league and you can see that when he works and you can see that when he's on the field that he's hungry. It comes through and you can see it."

Synonyms for hunger: grindiness, small ball, fire in the belly, David Eckstein.

Watching Ramirez play shortstop this spring has been quite a sight.

Cabrera was a Gold Glove shortstop who had an off year in his brief stay with the White Sox.

Before that, Juan Uribe was about as good of a shortstop as there was in baseball.

With the exception of 2004 -- when Uribe posted a league average .346 wOBA and contributed +1 wins with his defense -- Uribe has neither been defensively outstanding (+.25 fielding wins above average) nor offensively relevant (.306 career wOBA) in Chicago.

And before that, current manager Ozzie Guillen played the position at a pretty high level.

A mythical and lofty .264/.287/.338 level.

With his own flair, Guillen has already conceded Ramirez is better.

Ozzie Guillen was one of the worst players in the history of baseball, producing a negative win value for his team in every season he played. Just not playing shortstop makes you a better shortstop than Ozzie Guillen. Players like Mark Prior who spend the entire season on the DL have a higher win contribution (zero) than Ozzie Guillen. He was literally that bad. He was literally that bad.

"He's always making jokes on me," Ramirez said. "He's always, 'I was better than you. I was better than you.' I just say, 'OK.' I will try to be as good as him, maybe not better. I don't like to be compared to anyone, but I'm trying to be close to the way Ozzie played."

Did I mention Ozzie hit .264/.287/.338 in his career?

Guillen was the last Sox shortstop to win a Gold Glove, in 1990. Is Ramirez destined to be the next?

Last year, Orlando Cabrera's defense was worth +1.6 wins (the most among all starting shortstops by a .3 win (19%) margin). AL Golden Glove winner Michael Young's defense was worth -.25 wins, making him the seventh worst starting shortstop in baseball. Gold Glove awards are almost as useless a criteria by which to evaluate a player's defensive ability as comparing a shortstop's potential to the worst shortstop in the history of baseball (Ozzie Guillen).

"There are so many good shortstops in the American League, so that's not something I can come out and say," Ramirez said. "But my wife (Mildred) told me one time I should win the Gold Glove. I don't want to put pressure on myself, but I do have it in my mind."

If your wife tells you to do something, it'd be wise to oblige.

If Ramirez wants to go for the gold, Konerko has a suggestion.

"He's got a big arm; it's plenty strong enough," Konerko said. "He's going to make a lot of highlight plays this year, there's no question about that. I know nothing about playing shortstop,

Great advice, Konerko. "I know nothing about playing shortstop, but if you do what I say, you will be great at playing shortstop." Konerko goes on to say:

"You're going to see some plays made this year; you're going to see him on (ESPN's) 'Web Gems' a lot."

A third useless criteria by which to evaluate a shortstop is by the number of web gems he racks up in a season.

On an groundbreaking side note, I'm watching the WBC and Joe Morgan just criticized Adam Dunn because he is "happy to take walks" when runners are in scoring position instead of "being more aggressive at the plate." Steve Phillips agrees.