Fuck the fucking Cubs

Seriously. Between bullpen issues and runs scoring problems, the Cubs have been disappointing this season. Law school may have deprived me of the time I used to spent trolling daily changes in BP projections and fangraphs statistics, but it doesn't take a stat-heavy person to recognize the deficiency of the Cubs!

Despite Milton Bradley's .400 OBP abilities, his lack of any semblance of power has left Cubs fans drinking for Mark DeRosa juice. Even with the return of Ramirez and resurgence of Derrek Lee, the Cubs have failed to do anything necessary to win. Much of the problem has lied in the bullpen (Marmol's increasing BB/9 ratio, Kevin Gregg's inability to pitch, ETC.) and lineup's ability to score runs (where did the balance of power go? The Cubs have the 12th best ISO, but it's skewed between players like Fox and Ramirez). This season, the Cubs have the sixth worst Cluch rating in baseball -- in other words, as it is apparent to ANYONE who watches Cubs games, the Cubs cannot fucking cash in on runs scoring opportunities.

GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I hate this team's underachieving bullshit so much. When will be sign GOOD players?? When will we stop OVERPAYING mediocre ones (I'm looking at you, Alfonso Soriano)? My generous hope is that the sale of the Cubs to the Ricketts -- which was allegedly completed tonight -- will enter our organization into a new era of fan recognition in by which team management will finally fill areas of leadership with competence. Since Hendry was promoted from player development coordinator to GM, his track record has been spotty. Nothing he has picked in the first round since Mark Prior has been valuable and despite the awesome trade he engineered for the Ramirez, most of his moves have been questionable at best. The Cubs need a new direction. Such direction, in my opinion, is a new beginning. Fuck Hendry. Fuck the new Hitting coach. Fuck everyone. Put Ryno in the managerial position, get me a competent GM (hell, the Brewers got Doug Melvin!) and get me some draft talent!!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Cubsfan4ever argues he should be a GM if for no other reason than Steve Phillips were one. I argue that I should be one because I have some idea of statistical knowledge in reference to impact. If I were the Cubs, as of Aug 10, I would have made the following two moves:
1) Pick up John Smoltz off waivers -- the high K, low BB rate and inflated HR/FB rate all indicate that Smoltz still has gas left in the tank. His 4.37 FIP is well below his current ERA and the HR/FB rate is statistically due for regression to league average levels, given his peripherals.
2) Claim Billy Wagner off waivers -- if the Cubs have truly finalized the team's sale, new ownership should begin its tenure by efficiently spending its resources. Wagner struck out two tonight with 0 walks and 0 hits, putting 90s velocity on his offerings. If that's not a guy who is healthy and able, show me someone who is. Even if Wagner isn't 100% healthy, the Cubs are 6 games back after tonight's loss and need to start taking some high upside risks if they want to catch the Cardinals (or Wild Card).

If the Cubs took a risk with B.J. Ryan, why not with Smoltz? Oh yeah! Smoltz isn't a lefty! BRAIN FREEZE! :( -- Is it that unreasonable to expect at minimum this from a GM? Ugh!!