Box Score Tonight: May 20

I feel motivated today. Let's knock out the box scores from tonight!
  • Javier Vasquez stuck out 5 of the first 6 batters. DME made a stupid bet that he would get 13K in the game. He finished with only 6 and I get a free subway sandwich =) Braves get 9 runs in the 4th in a blowout of the Rockies.
  • Verlander continues to dazzle with 8K in 6IP hitting 99 on the gun. Nelson Cruz only hit his 2nd homer in 26 games.
  • The Yankees went back to back to back. Surprisingly all 3 homers went to right field. Nice job yankee stadium. Obstructed view seating and a little league fence in right. Well worth the 1.5 billion. Phil Hughes with his best start fanning 9 in 5IP.
  • Joel Hanrahan strikes again! Gives up 3 hits and a walk off wild pitch to lose the game. Maybe we should just admit that this guy sucks at baseball.
  • Scott Kazmir is completely broken! He cant even have a decent start against the no offense A's. I would rather have D-Train at this point. On the bright side, the Rays are 71 for 79 in stolen bases. That's a 90% success rate, Bill James would approve.
  • Order is restored to the universe with big papi hitting his first home run. Another bet that DME lost. Jason Bay hit a sedan across the street from the green monster, and Jason Varitek hit 2 home runs. MLB is obviously fixing games in favor of the Sox, that is the only explination to their dominance. That or a smart front office. Here is the secret, get jewish people to run your team. Andrew Friedman is to thank for the Rays success, not Longoria.
  • I dont know how Aaron Harang is making 14 million this year, but he's kinda earning it by shuting down the powerful phillies roster. He's also a monumentally horrible hitter with a career average of .081. If Raul Ibanez is so inspired to leave Seattle that he has 14 homers this year, imagine what Ichiro and King Felix would do if they ever left the M's
  • Way-Rod outduels Gallardo thanks to a 2.33FIB. How is it so low, well he gave up his first home run in the last 90IP. Also Michael Bourn got a hit and Kaz Matsui got called out for batting out of order, so Bourn got to hit again and walked. How hard is it to write out a lineup card people!?
  • Kerry Wood tried to blow another save by walking 3 in the 9th, but managed to protect a one run lead. Sidney Ponson is now 1-5. How does he have a job, but Jim Edmonds does not.
  • White Sox show off their one good quality by hitting 2 home runs including Jermaine Dye's grand slam. Maybe his clutch factor can move from 2nd worst to 4th worst! On the bright side, it's may 20th and Konerko is hitting above the mendoza line. Liriano's 4.8 FIP should be worrisome to his fantasy owners.
  • Chris Carpenter returned to the Cardinals after his 1oth DL stint. When healthy the guy is a beast posting FIPs of 3.85, 2.9, 3.44, 3.24 his 4 full years in St. Louis. Cubs are dreadful offensively, seems like Lou needs to blow a cylinder soon. Marmol has walked 17 in 19IP
  • Petco park should be considered a national park given it's size. People can go hiking and biking there for days it's so freaking big. Just another 2-1 padres win. The real Eckstein is featuring a negative VORP. In facts, 14 out of 24 eligable position players on the Padres have negative VORPs lead by Brian Giles -11.8
  • Mariners win a 1-0 game over the Angels thanks to that Jakubauskas guy. It appears that David Aardsma is the official closer for the M's. Aardsma actually comes first in the baseball dictionary just ahead of Henry Aaron.
  • For some reason all the west coast games tonight had 3 runs or less. This is no coincidence I am sure. Anyone have a clue why that may be the case? Maybe they know no one is watching hence they can just slack off? Anyway, Dodgers outlast the Mets 2-1
  • Dbacks and Marlins played in double header. First game went to the Fish behind a Dan Uggla 3 run homer. Mark Reynolds somehow managed 4 stolen bases and stole another base in game 2. He also hit 2 homers in game 2. The story was Justin Upton hitting 2 3-run homers in game 2, both to the upper deck measured at 420 and 458 feet. He seriously has 60 homer power and he's only 21!!!
Man that's exhausting


David "MVP" Eckstein said...

I'm calling shenanigans on the bet because they pulled javi before he even threw 70 pitches! We should have stipulated that he doesn't get pulled 5 innings into the game because the rockies are literally the worst team ever. Boooooo

David "MVP" Eckstein said...

Also, Hanley goes 0-9 with a BB, R


Sexy Rexy said...

WOO HOO, more more!

i love BST- this one wasnt that funny but considering i missed sportscenter today, very helpful, keep up the good work

do you think WRod will balance out Liriano for me? haha

The 'Bright' One said...

If you stop expecting funny, you wont be disappointed anymore.

Do you thing De La Rosa will balance out Jurrgens for you? hahaha